Love Is Not Irritable or Resentful

Ever since the Lord came down at Babel, words have been funny things. We often make jokes from homonyms. Consider this one that always gets a laugh from the preschoolers I know:

Q: Where does a shark keep his money? A: In a SAND BANK! hilarity ensues

We could list many examples, couldn’t we? Imagine confusing a bat with a bat!

Sometimes, when we come to the Scriptures, we have to reason carefully with the words the Holy Spirit inspired to understand what the human author intended by the word he chose. If we’re careful, we can find profound insights into God’s ways.

Love Is Not Irritable

This exact form of the verb translated “irritable” or “provoked” is only used once in the New Testament. Luke uses it in the past tense to describe Paul’s spirit as “irritated” when he saw the idols of Athens (Acts 17:16). The verbal form is used almost fifty times in the LXX (Deuteronomy 9:7-8, Psalm 105:29), often to describe God’s wrath. The noun version of the same word, “irritation,” is rarer in the Old Testament (Deuteronomy 29:28), but also occurs twice in the New Testament. Hebrews 10:24 calls us to consider how to cause one another irritation unto love and good works. And, in Acts 15:39, a sharp irritation arose between Paul and Barnabas such that they separated from each other. Luke assigns no blame to Paul and Barnabas’s irritable separation, but Paul seems to indicate here that the situation lacked love.

So, what is Paul saying? This is the only time Paul uses the word, though Luke uses it twice in Acts to describe Paul. In the context of Corinthian consternation, rivalry, boasting, and selfish ambition it’s easy to imagine wrathful emotions, speech, and behavior that don’t befit the patience and kindness of love.

Imagine a Corinthian brother who considers himself wise when a brother surpasses him publicly. Will he rejoice with his brother or be irritated at another’s success? Or the rivalry between sisters to be the best hostess, servant, or evangelist. We’re often tempted to rejoice at a rival’s downfall—judgmental irritation swells quickly in those moments. Something like that is what Paul is condemning as beyond the bounds of genuine love.

In all, don’t grow wrathfully irritated. Amongst Christians, love isn’t provoked to vengeful action. Sounds like the gospel if you think about it — for what else has the love and grace of Christ done for us but to save us from the wrath of God? It makes no sense for from-wrath-delivered sons of God to pour out their petty wrath on one another. Far better to suffer the offense humbly and forgive as you’ve been forgiven than to flare with anger at offenses.

Love Is Not Resentful

These go together now, don’t they? Many translations are more literal than the ESV when they write, “it keeps no record of wrongs.” Often, while we wisely restrain our tongues from flashing anger, our hearts still fester with a lovelessly-angry memory. Paul uses this word for record-keeping three times in a single paragraph in Romans; you may recall the word “reckon” from older translations.

“Now to the one who works, his wages are not counted as a gift but as his due. And to the one who does not work but believes in him who justifies the ungodly, his faith is counted as righteousness, just as David also speaks of the blessing of the one to whom God counts righteousness apart from works:” (Romans 4:4–6, ESV)

So, for Paul, this word for record-keeping is a gospel word through and through, and it is the Lord who is free to reckon sin as condemnation and faith unto righteousness, not us. We are either to forgive or leave the vengeance to the Lord; both responses release the offense from our clenched fists into the Lord’s nail-scarred hands.

So Then

So then, restrain irritation and resentment by looking to Christ. Remember your offenses that provoked the Lord’s anger and see his perfect patience on the cross. Who are you to flare with anger at a brother’s offense? Christ Jesus is the one who died; far be it from us to condemn and reckon evil from resentful hearts.

Oh, may such free and patient love characterize all God’s people as it did his Son. To him be the glory forever and ever.